the weight of disbelief

S - Bel bows down; Nebo stoops; their idols are on beasts and livestock; these things you carry are borne as burdens on weary beasts. They stoop; they bow down together; they cannot save the burden, but themselves go into captivity.

Listen to me, O house of Jacob, all the remnant of the house of Israel, who have been borne by me from before your birth, carried from the womb; even to your old age I am he, and to gray hairs I will carry you. I have made, and I will bear; I will carry and will save. - Isaiah 46:1-4 ESV

I am, and there is no one besides me... - Isaiah 47:8, 10 ESV

Thus says the LORD, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: "I am the LORD your God, who teaches you to profit, who leads you in the way you should go. Oh that you had paid attention to my commandments! Then your peace would have been like a river, and your righteousness like the waves of the sea; your offspring would have been like the sand, and your descendants like its grains; their name would never be cut off or destroyed from before me." - Isaiah 48:17-19

O - Deceived in their thinking the Israelites weighed themselves down with their false beliefs about what would provide for and save them. As they journeyed through the desert their trip was made harder with the weight of their idols. Practically their journey to exile could have been easier if they had cast aside their wrong beliefs. More practically, God has provided for them in the desert before. Not only would their loads be lighter, but there would be the water and food they needed. They were not alone. God was waiting for them to turn to him and profit from the richness of life he offered them in every aspect of their lives, though they would find themselves in exile in Babylon.

A - How am I deceived in my thinking? What am I counting on to provide for and protect me that actually is a burden? How am I buying into the belief that "I am, and there is no one beside me"?

P - Lord, as I start this day I feel the weight of things that are out of my control or a result of my lack of "expertise." They directly affect how my family is provided for. Am I in anyway believing that it is me, and me alone, who will provide for and save my family?

I think practically speaking it seems that way to me at times. I am tempted to live as if you do not work on the practical. But I remember. I remember how you led Abraham through the desert. I remember how you kept shoes from falling apart on the way from Egypt. I remember how you protected Nehemiah. I remember how your angels tended to Jesus. I remember how money arrived in the mailbox. I remember how you have been there every step of this last year.

Ask the next question, right? What would you want to say to me today...

Pay attention to my commandments
Your peace is like a river
Your righteouness is like a wave
Your children will always be before me

drunken sailors protest government spending

coming this sunday...

"Sunday's Coming" Movie Trailer from North Point Media on Vimeo.

forgiveness is hard...

The Four Promises of Forgiveness (Ken Sande, The Peacemaker):

• I will not dwell on your sin.
• I will not bring up your sin and use it against you.
• I will not talk to others about your sin.
• I will not allow your sin to stand between us or hinder our personal relationship.

I'm grateful that Jesus does this consistently and quickly with me (since he really did it all in the past, how cool).

solitude and community

“Only in fellowship do we learn to be rightly alone and only in aloneness do we learn to be rightly in fellowship.” — Dietrich Bonhoeffer

a hidden life

O tree,
what hidden life
that birds and worms
and bugs enjoy

A world its own

How observed, O tree
that bustle of bikes
and cars go by
you stand still, yet alive

Who knows, O tree
from whenst life came
the rushing throng of people
the steady flow of creek

You stand, O tree
a testament to Creator
known and knowing
living and dying

A steady full life

And me, O tree
must I a hidden life,
a still and steady life,
known and knowing?

What life, O tree
do you know of for me

resurrection

Resurrection: Rob Bell from The Work of Rob Bell on Vimeo.

easter hymn: rock of ages

I will let this song speak of my friend Jesus this glorious morning:


Rock Of Ages - Chris Rice

Rock of Ages, cleft for me,
Let me hide myself in Thee;
Let the water and the blood,
From Thy wounded side which flowed,
Be of sin the double cure;
Save from wrath and make me pure.


Not the labor of my hands
Can fulfill Thy law's demands;
Could my zeal no respite know,
Could my tears forever flow,
All for sin could not atone;
Thou must save, and Thou alone.


Nothing in my hand I bring,
Simply to the cross I cling;
Naked, come to Thee for dress;
Helpless look to Thee for grace;
Foul, I to the fountain fly;
Wash me, Savior, or I die.


While I draw this fleeting breath,
When mine eyes shall close in death,
When I soar to worlds unknown,
See Thee on Thy judgment throne,
Rock of Ages, cleft for me,
Let me hide myself in Thee.

death drips juicy

Twisted deception
your curtain veils
what is good
and what I have

Instead, a faulty offer
Your apple
which eye and mouth
and hand and
heart all approve

Death drips juicy
sweet across the lips
as it kills

good friday hymn: o love that will not let me go

This is how I am thinking about the cross today:


O Love That Will Not Let Me Go...



O Love that will not let me go,
I rest my weary soul in thee;
I give thee back the life I owe,
That in thine ocean depths its flow
May richer, fuller be.

O light that followest all my way,
I yield my flickering torch to thee;
My heart restores its borrowed ray,
That in thy sunshine's blaze its day
May brighter, fairer be.

O Joy that seekest me through pain,
I cannot close my heart to thee;
I trace the rainbow through the rain,
And feel the promise is not vain,
That morn shall tearless be.

O Cross that liftest up my head,
I dare not ask to fly from thee;
I lay in dust life's glory dead,
And from the ground there blossoms red
Life that shall endless be.

lord and king

A still and steady man
eyes gazing past the present

To see as you see
the world as it could be

A lively and playful man
heart firmly placed in love

To know this love
the joy of eternal embrace

A strong and mighty man
hands not working on their own

To feel a presence beyond yourself
a trust of help that always comes

Behold, the man

contact & conflict

In cultural engagement there's a point of contact & a point of conflict. That's the sharp end of the gospel and where repentance is focused. — Steve Timmis

life returns

Spring is coming
from all around the world
it peaks through death
a blade, a blossom, a buzz
Hints that life goes on
beneath the cold death
life has been living
Always present, always strong
though under attack at every turn
life presses on

When will spring come in me
what seems a cold season of death
has been covering my ground
buried, there beneath my ground
a Spirit cries out for more
a blade of faith
a blossom of love
a buzz of hope

I, like the earth,
am not left in winter
and everything hidden presses
up and through the depths
Bleak limbs bud
and barren hills green
The stream flows
bringing life along its narrow path
And so with me
Eyes opened to the sun
mouth quenched by the stream

Life returns
as it was always meant to be

can smart people believe in god?

Can you KNOW that God exists? Dallas Willard answered some great questions and helped people think differently about this, and a great number of other "tough questions" regarding faith and God. It's in written form in his most recent book Knowing Christ Today, but it is also in audio form from the four different services (all different questions) from Menlo Park Presbyterian Church. I recommend both!

paper and the pulpit

"I confess that I have not invariably been comfortable in front of a pulpit; I have never been comfortable behind one. To be behind a pulpit is always a forcible reminder to me that I am an essayist, and in many ways a dissenter. An essayist is, literally, a writer who attempts to tell the truth. Preachers must resign themselves to being either right or wrong; an essayist, when proved wrong, may claim to have been 'just practicing.' An essayist is privileged to speak without institutional authorization. A dissenter, of course, must speak without privilege." — Wendell Berry, "Christianity and The Survival of Creation"

what story is your life telling?

"Neither revolution nor reformation can ultimately change a society, rather you must tell a new powerful tale, one so persuasive that it sweeps away the old myths and becomes the preferred story, one so inclusive that it gathers all the bits of our past and our present into a coherent whole, one that even shines some light into the future so that we can take the next step... If you want to change a society, then you have to tell an alternative story." — attributed to Ivan Illich, Former Austrian priest and philosopher

What story is your life telling?

reflection for 2010: trained by grace

A new decade begins...

I have been spending some time in Titus lately. I am pleasantly surprised by what I have found there. I am encouraged by Paul's straightforward expression of the transforming reality of God's grace and gospel in Jesus. Here's the passage that stands out to me as the central catalyst of everything else in this little letter:

For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works. — Titus 2:11-14 (ESV)

I think it reflects a growing desire in me, perhaps for 2010. To be trained by grace. By Jesus. By the gospel. There are three actions grace trains us to have. To RENOUNCE, to LIVE, and to WAIT. Here are the nuggets I have pulled out so far.

RENOUNCE, in the Greek there is a sense of "refusing something offered." It is clear that my flesh (the part of me use to living without dependence upon or relationship with God), the world, and the Enemy offer me alternatives to God's way of life. While I have an inclination towards sin, that is not the end of the story. I can stand firm in resisting, rejecting, refusing anything that is offered to me apart from God.

LIVE, in the Greek there is a sense of "to enjoy life" and "be full of vigor." What a gift it is to live! To really be alive. I was reading 10 Resolutions for Mental Health from the Desiring God blog, Kilby's suggestions seemed to express exactly what this word is saying about enjoying life with God. His reflections on God, creation, and men are not contingent on circumstances, they reflect an eternal perspective on the gift of life.

WAIT, in the Greek is pretty unique. It reflects the opening to companionship and intimacy, while also the idea of expecting a promise to be fulfilled. This is a pretty amazing word. I do not want to think I know all I can about what Paul is trying to express. Since I am living in a unique, to me, state of waiting I am very excited about this. In the waiting there is an invitation to more relationship than has been experienced. It is the kind of waiting used for a man and wife becoming one. In waiting there is also a confidence in promises being fulfilled. So, as relationship and circumstance have not yet arrived at what is ultimately desired, there is great joy in the anticipation.

Lord, train me by your grace through Jesus to refuse any offer that is not from you, to enjoy the fullness of life today, and to joyfully anticipate the consummation of your will in my life and the world.